Sarah Sue
by You Can't Apparate at Hogwarts
Summary: Sarah Jenkins is writing a fanfiction. It's just the way she likes it, she's the ever-popular Mary Sue (aka Bethany Parker) and her two best friends are her sworn enemies. Unfortunately for her, Bethany doesn't like the life Sarah created for her.
1. Elizabeth's POV

Bethany wants out of this nightmare, and the three friends aren't going to like how she gets it ...  
  
Disclaimer - These characters don't belong to us, just having a little play...  
  
Elizabeth's POV:  
  
The room appeared to shiver, the walls fading away, and the sofa beneath me became hard. Wow, I thought, really must be sleep deprived. I closed my eyes for a moment, and then reopened them. This most certainly wasn't my living room anymore. We were sitting in a courtyard, surrounded by a stone building. The air was crisp, and there was snow on the ground.  
  
"What the…" Sarah began, but the rest of the words eluded her. I tore my gaze away from our surroundings for a moment, discovering that Sarah was now sprawled over a patch of grass, no longer on the hideous red carpet of my lounge, and Jamie was sitting next to me on the stone seat. The couch had vanished completely.  
  
"Weird dream," Jamie muttered.  
  
"Yeah, especially since it's my dream," Sarah said, almost accusingly.  
  
Two figures came into view across the courtyard and the three of us turned to stare at them. Sarah jumped to her feet, Jamie and I both went to stand up. My heart was pounding in my chest, wondering who these people were. They were dressed in long black robes, and that coupled with the fact that my house had just vanished, made me just a tad panicky. Sarah flew around, stared at us and mouthed "RUN!"  
  
I couldn't find my legs, as much as I wanted to get out of there. Then Jamie grabbed my arm and whispered harshly "Look at them."  
  
"What?! No, let's get out of …" Sarah demanded. I glanced at the figures again as they came into focus - dammit, I really needed to get some new glasses. I could make out the black cloaks, and then grey clothing beneath. As they came closer the v-neck jersey appeared, and then I saw one had on a pleated skirt and I turned to stare at Jamie my mouth hanging open.  
  
"Is…that…?"  
  
"Hogwarts uniforms," she said amazed.  
  
Sarah halted at these words and turned to stare too.  
  
"My god," she muttered. "What the…"  
  
The two grew closer. The girl on the left had rather familiar looking bushy brown hair, while the boy on the right had trademark red.  
  
"There you two are! Merlin, Professor Snape is having a hippogriff! Says he's going to get you expelled! And where are you uniforms?!"  
  
Hermione was staring directly at Jamie and I.  
  
"Uh…" Jamie gave me a glance.  
  
"Um," I said, staring at Hermione, quite shocked. "Um, sorry. We'll go change."  
  
"No time for that! You'd better come to class now!" She gave Sarah a glare. "Guess that's what you get, hanging around with Slytherins."  
  
Jamie and I turned to stare at Sarah.  
  
"What the…"  
  
"Come on!" Hermione insisted, stalking back to the castle. Ron looked at Sarah with disgust, and followed Hermione. I looked at Sarah and she looked utterly confused.  
  
"What am I supposed to do?" she squeaked.  
  
"Just come with us. If you are a Slytherin Snape is hardly going to do anything to you," Jamie insisted.  
  
"True," Sarah commented, and the three of us started after Hermione and Ron, keeping distant enough to talk. "How did we get here?"  
  
"No time for that now, I think we had just better play along. Look, as soon as we get a chance we'll meet back here and talk," I said as we entered a long corridor, grateful for the warmth.   
  
"Okay," she whispered, looking awfully pale.  
  
"I guess we must be Gryffindor," Jamie said to me, as we turned a corner, hurrying a little more so as to not lose sight of Hermione.  
  
"Yeah, I guess."  
  
"You're right," Sarah said, coming around, "we had better just go along with this. I mean, how hard can it be, right? We've read all the books, watched the movies, heck, we probably know Hogwarts better than anyone." We continued down a set of stone steps, my heels clicking loudly.  
  
"Yes, and if they think there's something odd going on with us, you know what will happen. We'll be locked up and accused of being of Voldemort's lot," I warned.  
  
Hermione had come to a halt outside a large wooden door.  
  
"Well, I guess I'll see you later…" Sarah said hesitantly, obviously not wanting to split up.  
  
"Where are you going?" Hermione snapped at Sarah.  
  
She looked at Jamie and I.  
  
"Uh, class?" she asked quite innocently. I gave her a sharp look - nice way to not let them know!  
  
"Don't get smart with me, Bethany! That's 10 points from Slytherin!"  
  
Sarah gave us another look, utterly confused. "Well, I'll be going then…" she whispered, looking terrified as she turned to walk back along the corridor where we'd come from.  
  
"Wrong way! You have potions as well!" Hermione announced, with a condescending look.   
  
"Bloody Slytherins," Ron muttered to himself. Hermione cracked the door to the dungeon open and slowly crept in.  
  
"Ah, Miss Granger, Mr Weasley, I see you've found your silly little class mates! Welcome, ladies, so nice of you to stop by. That'll be 10 points each from Gryffindor. You too, Weasley and Granger. Took your blessed time finding them, didn't you? Oh, and look, no uniforms! Well, there's another 20 points each. Care to take your seats? Of course, I could go on taking points all day if you wish…"  
  
Sarah stood there awkwardly as Snape continued to glare at the rest of us, ignoring her late arrival and mufty clothing. Draco Malfoy was furiously indicating for her to come and sit next to him. Snape gave Sarah a confused glance and jerked his head towards the empty seat, motioning for her to sit down. Sarah gave us a scared look, but eventually swaggered up to Malfoy and seated herself.  
  
I spotted two seats halfway up the class, and grabbed Jamie's arm, tugging her towards them. Snape glided over to the desk we sat at, looming over us.  
  
"Oh, and Miss Black?"   
  
Jamie looked at me, and I returned the look.  
  
"Yes?" I piped up. Heck, it was a fifty-fifty chance.  
  
Snape sneered. "We all know you can talk, Miss Simons, but I have been assured that Miss Black has her own voice."  
  
"Yes?" Jamie whispered.   
  
"Yes, SIR! Take that hunk of metal out of your face! Another twenty points! And the same for you, Miss Simons, since you can't stop your incessant babbling long enough for your friend to answer to her own name, pathetic as it is."  
  
"Yes, Sir." Jamie began to fiddle with the ring in her eyebrow. She struggled for a few moments before it came free.  
  
Snape gave us one last glare, before stalking back to the front of the class.  
  
"Now, get on with your potions!"  
  
I picked up a bottle from the table before us and whispered to Jamie  
  
"Man, what an arse he is!"  
  
"Course we know why…"  
  
"Black. Your last name is Black! Girl, are you in for some serious crap," I teased, looking up at the black board and finding the first ingredient.  
  
"Eek," Jamie whispered, "you're right. Could be another Black though…"  
  
"I suppose…" I poured three drops of Dragons blood into the cauldron. "Pass me the phoenix feathers…"  
  
"What are you doing? WE can't make potions!"  
  
"What? It's just like Chemistry, we'll be sweet."  
  
She passed the two feathers over and I dropped them in. "At least he has Alan Rickman's voice…"  
  
"He has his body too," Jamie laughed at me.  
  
"Eh, I'll have to live with that…"  
  
Jamie burst into a giggling fit, unable to help herself.  
  
"Miss Black, perhaps you would like to share what is so funny with the class?!" Snape was on his feet, his hands on his hips glaring at us.   
  
I was starting to get a little irritated by his constant harassment of Jamie, and after all this had to be a dream.  
  
"Well, actually, Sir, we were discussing Grey Undies."  
  
The class snickered, not knowing what I was saying. Jamie, however gasped. Snape had turned a shade of red I wouldn't have thought was humanly possible.  
  
"DETENTION MISS SIMONS!" 


	2. Jamie's POV

After almost dipping my long brown hair into the potion, we decided it was best that I leave the brewing to Elizabeth. I sat watching her and humming quietly to myself.  
  
"What IS that you're humming?" Elizabeth asked, reaching past me for some powdered toadstool.  
  
"Red Dwarf theme song." I replied absently. The potion bubbled promisingly.  
  
"I thought I recognised it. What class do you think we have next?"  
  
"I think we should just get through..." I was cut off by Snape telling us to bottle our potions and bring them up to his desk. Elizabeth was just putting the stopper in our bottle.  
  
"I'll take that up." I reached out for the bottle Elizabeth was holding and got off my chair, she smiled proudly at the perfect mauve colour it had turned. As I walked up towards the front of the class Harry turned from Snape's desk and walked back the other way.  
  
"We need to talk." He whispered as he walked past me, I looked at his retreating back in confusion. Oh no, what does that mean?  
  
Sarah stood in front of me when I reached the front of the room, Snape looked at her with almost a smile.  
  
"Perfect again, Miss Parker. I see Draco left the work up to you again, excellent." She turned and he saw me, I quickly put the potion on his desk and hurried back to where Elizabeth was waiting.  
  
"Oh Miss Black?" I turned around reluctantly.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"You can join Miss Simons in detention." He smirked.  
  
"What for," I hesitated, "Sir?"  
  
"You let Miss Simons do all the work. Despite that probably being the BEST idea, I'm still giving you detention."  
  
"Well let's all jump for smegging joy." I muttered as we walked out of the classroom.  
  
Sarah began to follow us as we walked away from Potions, but Draco Malfoy was again indicating for her to follow him.  
  
"You better go with him." I hissed.  
  
"But he keeps trying to touch me." She replied, smiling slightly and turning to join Malfoy down the corridor, who immediately took her hand and scurried away.  
  
  
  
Between classes Hermione insisted we go and change, to keep from losing more precious Gryffindor house points. We had to run to keep up with her as she led us to the seventh year dormitory, and she watched impatiently as we both nervously looked around.  
  
"Well, hurry up then." She jerked her head towards two adjacent beds, the trunks at each end had the initials OB and TS. We figured these were ours and ran to them. We searched quickly for our robes and uniforms, barely noticing what else was contained in the trunks.  
  
"Aren't you forgetting your school things?" Hermione pointed towards two bags slumped in a corner, I picked them both up and handed one to Elizabeth. Hermione gave one last disapproving look around the room, and walked hastily out with us following close behind.  
  
Our next class was transfiguration, and we were decidedly nervous as we took our seats behind Harry, Ron, and Hermione.  
  
"What do we do? We can't DO anything." Elizabeth asked.  
  
"Fake it?" I replied unsure.  
  
"Just wave our wands and hope for the best?" Elizabeth took what looked like a stick with a handle from the pocket of her robes, she waved it for effect. Hermione grabbed her hand and looked at her sternly.  
  
"Careful where you point that thing."  
  
"Oh, sorry." Elizabeth placed the wand gingerly on the desk.  
  
"Now class, in the NEWT examinations..." Professor McGonagall started.  
  
"We don't have to sit those, do we?" I asked quietly.  
  
"You think?"  
  
"...that everyone must pass." McGonagall stopped talking and looked at the class with thin lips. She turned and waved her arm towards the blackboard and it covered itself with complicated notes. The rest of the class seemed to be copying them down so Elizabeth and I followed suit. Elizabeth adjusted easily to writing with a quill, but I was making an awful mess of the parchment in front of me.  
  
"Right, everyone has that down? Good." McGonagall took out her wand and approached a small rodent perched on her desk.  
  
"What the hell IS that?" I whispered to Elizabeth, she smiled knowingly.  
  
"It's a lemming." We watched entranced as McGonagall transfigured the lemming into a small box. She walked down the aisle and stopped next to where I was sitting, nervously trying not to meet her eyes.  
  
"Now Miss Black, you try." I opened my mouth to say I did not have an animal to transfigure, when I suddenly realised that I did. I picked up my wand and pointed it towards the rodent, he seemed to be sniffing it with interest.  
  
"Commutatus capsa." I jerked my hand and to my surprise the rodent changed fluidly into a perfect symmetrical box.  
  
"Go Jamie!" Elizabeth whispered, and I smiled. McGonagall placed her hand on my shoulder.  
  
"20 points to Gryffindor. Now everyone try." There were many choruses of 'commutatus capsa' from around us but Elizabeth did not try. Hermione turned from her own perfect box and faced us.  
  
"Tallulah, are you gonna get a detention for this class too?" Elizabeth looked at her with disgust.  
  
"Tallulah!? Oh," she snapped out of her self induced trance, "no. Commutatus capsa." She jabbed the animal with her wand. It transfigured into a box identical to mine, except that it still had brown fur and small pointy ears.  
  
"Good enough." I said, patting her box. She let out a snort of laughter and clapped her hand over her mouth. Hermione turned back to the front, irritated.  
  
"My name is Tallulah? Oh God, I must have horrible parents."  
  
"It's alright, um ... Lu?" Elizabeth was silent for a few seconds.  
  
"Tallulah! It's terrible. Wonder what your name is."  
  
"I'm sure we'll find out soon enough." There was a cry behind us and we turned to see Neville Longbottom with a lemming clamped onto one of his fingers.  
  
"Commutatus capsa." I shouted, pointing my wand at Neville's flailing arm. The transfigured box flew off his hand and into the wall.  
  
"Another 20 points to Gryffindor, Miss Black. I think you had better go and see Madame Pomphrey Mr Longbottom, before your next class." A bell sounded to indicate the end of class, Elizabeth and I looked at each other as we picked up our transfigured boxes and bags.  
  
"Come on Tallulah. We've got Arithmancy now." Hermione said, walking towards the door. I followed, but felt an arm draped heavily around my shoulders, looking around to see Ron smiling at me from under his fiery hair.  
  
"Come on, Divination awaits." I panicked silently as we were led towards opposite ends of the castle.  
  
I began to cough as soon as I entered the smokey room. Trying to take deep breaths but simply filling my lungs with more incense smoke.  
  
"I keep telling you Orion, just don't breathe." Harry said, taking his seat. Orion? I sat between him and Ron and tried not to be noticed.  
  
"I have foreseen that this topic will be on the exam this year, so we must all study hard." I couldn't help it, I started laughing. Professor Tralawney glared at me from the front of the room.  
  
"Something funny?" She asked, the class turned to look at me.  
  
"How do you foresee something that is totally in your power?" Ron snorted.  
  
"I foresee many things." She dismissed me with a wave of her hand.  
  
"Rii-iight." I looked at my copy of 'Unfogging the Future'.  
  
"Now, turn to page 807. We will be doing dream analysis this week." I smiled widely.  
  
"Thank you Dr Freud." I can do this, I thought. Four years of studying psychology had to be good for something, and if not, I could bullshit my way out of anything so I'll have no problem with a simple Divination class.  
  
"What?" Ron looked up from his textbook, his brow furrowed.  
  
"Oh, nothing." I replied.  
  
I managed to fluke my way through Divination with top marks, and headed happily towards the Gryffindor common room where I hoped Elizabeth was waiting. Harry and Ron talked animatedly about the upcoming quidditch match with Slytherin that they would both be playing in.  
  
"Orion?" Harry repeated, I blinked and looked at him blankly.  
  
"What? You were talking quidditch and I wasn't listening." Ron and Harry chuckled.  
  
"I asked what you got Hermione for her birthday, it's next week."  
  
"Oh, I can't remember. Sorry. Probably a book though." I replied vaguely.  
  
As we walked in through the portrait I saw Elizabeth sitting beside the window, gazing out at the grounds, and breathed a sigh of relief. I made an attempt to rush towards her, Harry gripped my arm and I looked round at him annoyed.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I need to talk to you," he looked quickly around, "in private."  
  
"Okay, but quickly." I followed him back out the portrait hole, he turned back sharply as it closed behind us.  
  
"I need you to ask Tallulah something." I cringed, "I know you don't want to get involved in this, but your father wanted as to be like brother and sister. I know Sirius isn't my father but he's the closest thing I've had, and I feel like we are. Wouldn't a sister do this for her brother?" I stared at him blankly, "will you talk to Lu or not?"  
  
"Alright, what...?" I trailed off.  
  
"Just find out if she likes me."  
  
"Oh, that could be hard." Especially considering I didn't know where the REAL Tallulah was. The portrait hole opened, Ron briefly stuck his head around, and then it closed again. I looked at Harry and he shrugged. Again it opened, but this time Elizabeth stepped out.  
  
"There you are, um," she faltered, "I've been waiting for ages." Harry glanced at me, smiled at Elizabeth, and stepped through the still open portrait.  
  
"Where have you been?"  
  
"Having a nice little chat with The Boy Who Lived."  
  
"Interesting, was it?"  
  
"I found out a few things."  
  
"Like?"  
  
"My name is Orion."  
  
"Orion?"  
  
"We should probably start using our names from now on." She nodded, but was still thinking over my name.  
  
"Oh I get it ... Sirius, Andromeda, Bellatrix, Orion. You've got a whole star thing going on." She chuckled.  
  
"Yes, wonderful as that is. I also found out that Sirius is my father, and that Harry has a little crush on you. Oh, and I am so good at Divination it's scary."  
  
"Well then, you've got it easy. I went to bloody class, and STILL don't know what Arithmancy is."  
  
"You don't?"  
  
"Wait a minute, what did you say about Harry?" She stared at me, mouth agape. 


End file.
